this one hits to close to home!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
a horrible night and day
well I woke up screaming. well I was screaming and J could hear me down stairs other end of the building. I was sleep paralysed and all I could do was scream, couldn't open my eyes or move and I was faintly aware I was screaming, the J. woke me up and the screaming really started. at least it wasn't the weekend and everyone was home.
then I forgot to take my meds, so by six thirty pm I was throwing things and trying to start a fist fight with J. totally out of character for me as I am a self destructive person, and I killed a bag of yoghurt containers. then I just screamed and cried till I had it out of my system. someone said it sounded like a small child being beaten to death.
now my face is in full flare, I am losing it.
stark raving bonkers, but all the best are.
fuck it.
am I ever going to be okay?
then I forgot to take my meds, so by six thirty pm I was throwing things and trying to start a fist fight with J. totally out of character for me as I am a self destructive person, and I killed a bag of yoghurt containers. then I just screamed and cried till I had it out of my system. someone said it sounded like a small child being beaten to death.
now my face is in full flare, I am losing it.
stark raving bonkers, but all the best are.
fuck it.
am I ever going to be okay?
Sunday, April 4, 2010
I was inspired!
I have been reading my great friend's blog http://thingsthatfizz.blogspot.com/2010/04/love-crab-hate-crab.html by the Great AV, and it is only one of his vast blogs~all a great read!
click on the title, and it will take you to Things that Fizz.
AV is a very good cook and is constantly broad-minded my horizons as to different tastes that can go together.
So this is where I was tonight. I had pissed in all the cheerios that I had planned for the day.
And it being Easter and seeing the movie Alice in wonderland, and feeling like I was home, and that I had lost something when I left the theater, I was out of sorts.
so I had a late start, like 5pm.
I had some red pepper bisque recently and it was very metallic, as they used heavy cream. I am trying to stay away from milk products except cheese and yoghurt. I love coconut milk and products.
so I baked some red peppers (7) and potatoes(2Lbs) that were on sale. when they were done I took coconut milk and coconut milk powder (as I would be too runny) and hand blendered it all together then added precooked de-veined shrimp. hint, blender all of the solids to purée before adding the milks. and ya know what? it is faboo!
the metallic taste disappeared.
I also made fried egg sandwiches, and polenta with cheese, sausage and basil red sauce. too salty for my tastes, everyone else liked it.
I like using my own ingredients that I make but sometimes I give up taste for convenience, plus I suck at making polenta.
so happy men, full bellies, and a better Easter than it started.
I actually can't wait to sleep tonight last nights dreams while very disturbing, were nice.
it is always a nice change to have them this side of horrific than the other side...
sleep well all!
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Happy Easter
As some kind of disclaimer, Tasty eggs were harmed and eaten!
Un-bunch you panties and enjoy!
Un-bunch you panties and enjoy!
How to Dance in the Rain
It was a busy morning, about 8:30 , when an elderly gentleman in
his 80's arrived at the hospital to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be
over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him
looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing
home to eat breakfast with his wife.
I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for a while and that she
was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked,
I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that
she had not recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every
morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me,
but I still know who she is.'
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been,
will be, and will not be.
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of every-thing; they just make the best of everything they have.
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,
but how to dance in the rain.'
his 80's arrived at the hospital to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be
over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him
looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing
home to eat breakfast with his wife.
I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for a while and that she
was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked,
I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that
she had not recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every
morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me,
but I still know who she is.'
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been,
will be, and will not be.
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of every-thing; they just make the best of everything they have.
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,
but how to dance in the rain.'
a Cruel twist of fate...
THIS IS A VERY TOUCHING STORY, VERY HARD TO READ, ABOUT TWO BROTHERS WHO WERE SEPARATED AT BIRTH.
IT'S A STORY OF LIFE & DEATH, AND THE CRUEL TWIST OF FATE.
IT'S CERTAIN TO STIR YOUR HEART AND TOUCH YOUR SOUL.
IT'S A STORY OF LIFE & DEATH, AND THE CRUEL TWIST OF FATE.
IT'S CERTAIN TO STIR YOUR HEART AND TOUCH YOUR SOUL.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
