happy trails to you...

don't mind me I am withdrawing from meds.
aka I am losing it.
I am running a fever.
take heat sickness, combine it with food poisoning/flu, cut off you eye lids and then roll in broken glass.
you have me
the DR's are the ones doing it. so seeing them is no help.
which I will tomorrow and Wednesday. tomorrow is Dr.dangerous, and weds in Dr.dumbass.
both are taking me off of meds.
Dr. DA is worried about my liver.
well if I kill myself due to the pain )my acupuncturist fired me cause of the lawsuit, so no help there(
then my liver really doesn't matter does it?
oh and the right side of my face is in FULL flare.
last night I actually prayed to god not to have me wake up this am, and I believe in it like I do Santa. A really mean mocking Santa.
hang on have to barf.
that's not better...
and while Dr.DA understands my frustration, as that is what she was telling me. she offers nothing to help.
I am sick of Dr.s I am sick of pain . I am sick of it.

this is venting. if this was an actually suicide letter I would be checked in to the nearest loony bin. thank you, this is a recording, 9072.

hahahahahahahahahahaHa.........
*SIGH*
problem is I am no good at trying to kill myself, I always change my mind after and seek help.

Q:what do you to when you are in to much pain to live and to afraid to die?
A:keep living, and trying to find answers that don't involve the end of a needle.

I might try the ER today. maybe the can make it worse/better.

love you all.
Adora