finally after 2 days I was able to sleep.
I am awake. I think. yeah, I am. I hurt, so I must be awake.
feeling better. CT took me around yesterday, after I wore J out.
went to Zanna's house, and lost it.
I Started hysterical laughing/crying. and could not stop.
it is something that I have started doing, well I did it before for time to time but not like this. this is something that started happening after I saw the acupuncturist this summer, he hit something and it was like the flood gates opened.
twice this month I have done this. well it is Fucken February.
still going off of medication, and losing weight.
YEAH for me!
I think it is how I am preventing rapid mood swings.
I am doing this, and I am getting a weeks, or month worth of emotions out at once.
so my over all moods are better.
So other than embarrassment, of completely losing it. I am fine.
Whatever...
About Me
- Adorabibble
- too cold, Alaska, United States
- now as to the love I have been getting from my followers that comment, thanks! I am having my rough times, I am pissed, I have every right to be. if I don't get this out safely I will hurt myself. I always do. so this is the place that I have to vent. my choice. it will be rough to read, it is hell to feel it. this is not a happy shiny place any more. read if you want but the disclaimer reads like this: ugly and putrid, welcome to the shit that sits in my head and is killing me slowly. it will not be fun, it might be funny. it will be raw and like an open sore that you are picking at even though you know better. this is the shit that I torture myself with, that leaves me with no hair and open wounds on my body, cause I can't stop tearing at my self. None is actively abusing me but me. there are assholes, and if you give it you will get it in spades, good or bad. you have been warned.
4 comments:
Sounds like whatever it is, it's good for you Shan..
it is working. I am not so emotional all the time :).
Yeah for you, indeed! laughing/crying does more good than meds. Norhing wrong with that at all, and a foot massage while in a sad/happy state of mind is THE best medicine! I always gave my docs the evil cross sign whenever meds were brought into the conversation. Let reality be your high, Bib! and without our lows, we would take the highs for granted. I ramble. forgive. Do and feel what's right for you. Listen to your body. It's much more intimate with itself than any doctor, lawyer, indian chief :-)
thanks Beth.
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