Tuesday, May 5, 2009

all the fun that you can have at 1 am with a crack head!

I was at the ER tonight from 6pm to 1am. I have lost allot of fat. I am still heavy but it is allot of muscle. Fat in women stores estrogen. and as a woman gets heavier her periods tend to disappear.
that is what has happened in my case, most of my adult life my periods have always been wonky, for a long time I was on hormones. (the abuse didn't help any)

(they have taken me off due to the fact that my Mother has had cancer 3 times, all hormonal and the last was breast cancer brought on by HRT from the previous cancer being cervical and having a total hysterectomy at the age of 32 or 33. My mother now has the cancer enzymes in her blood they just haven't figured out where cancer #4 is. she has 5 years, but you all know that from reading my previous posts)

now as long as I have a period every 90 days my ob/gyn is very happy and I have to take no pills (hormones)
well this time I was 46 days between! meaning instead of 4 periods a year I will have at least 6. and they will increase as I drop weight. last time I was 375lbs I was every 31 days.

the problem with the weight loss (the fat) is I just dumped a whole bunch of estrogen into my system. (along with other toxins that my fat was protecting me from) what does that mean?
in the last 24 hrs I have lost allot of blood, way, way more than usual. I won't go into how much for men read this blog, but enough to make the dr. on call make me go to the ER. I couldn't think straight, I was dizzy to the point of passing out. and a giant cramp from just below my ribs to my toes.
well they took blood and did an pap exam. I had my own meds with me so I took those, as per dr.
I am to push fluids I went and got some electrolyte drinks. and some Pamprin (god save the world)
for those of you it is like Midol with out the caffeine. ( let me rant for a minute, CAFFEINE? are those stupid assholes for real? give a pissed off woman with PMS and cramps caffeine? okay that is like giving a 2 year old, a quad espresso and a can of chili) if you don't get this read my post of the lady who told the Have a nice period guy what to do...
FUCKTARDS!!
so I am also on bed rest so I don't fall on my face, as I am down about a pint of blood. in 24 hrs!
so I have to follow up with dr's and ob/gyn. oh well...

So this is where the fun starts. I am released and I am waiting for J. to come get me from the ER.
I am waiting outside and it smells like it is going to rain and it is cool out. (keep in mind I am going from freezing due to the blood loss and hot flashes due to being female)
and it is dark out and quiet.
well this woman and i use that term loosely tries to steal someone else's cab and gets caught so now she is sitting with me cause she is cold... (go inside where it is warm!!!)
she is strung out...
and I ask her why she is in the ER.
Your gonna love this. she crashed her truck today in a snowbank and broke her nose...
*it is May*, *it has been in the upper 60's and sunny for a week* *there is no sign of snow* *anywhere*, and hasn't been for 3 weeks, we have dust! and all the stuff left from the snow like the sand and crap that they put on the road, we are starting to get green grass and the dog shit has been in bloom for almost a month!
more like her pimp beat her up... okay...
I feel bad for her, and she is painfully thin, crack thin.
she is eying me and my tinker bell purse. and keeps scooting closer to me.
I have had enough.
she asks me why I was in the ER I have my cough mask around my arm. (my allergies are in full bloom and I can't stop coughing and almost 3 weeks ago I had an asthma attack that put me in the ER with 10 days of prednisone, and I caught the tail end of the crud at the time and all of the dust is killing me.
anyone with a cough *HAS* to wear a mask... as Charli wrote today she was at her dr appt and the receptionist asked her to wear a mask as she is at the tail end of bronchitis (no longer contagious), but with the swine flu scare it is like saying the word BOMB! so you wear one.)
I will directly quote to you what I said to the crack head eying my purse...

"See the mask that is on my arm? I have swine flu, and since I am outside and the mask is hot I took it off." Oh and I start coughing which sounds like a seal getting raped...

Boy did she move as far away from me as possible as quickly as possible!
I know it was mean... but she was in my personal space, and trying to figure out if I had narcotics on me and if she could get my purse away from me.
I used to be her. all except the painfully thin. and if I went to the ER at least I had a better story. (I broke my knee in the tub and was still in the tub and wet when the paramedics got there, even though it was my ex husband that did it he then stripped me naked and put me in the tub and got me wet before he called for help)

I have just spent 7 miserable hrs in the ER, I am in pain,(the 2 male nurses that triaged me asked me to rate the pain on a scale of 1 to 10, I told them it felt like someone had kicked me in the nuts with steel toed cleats, if I had nuts! one nurse cringed and reached for his junk and the other laughed, gotta have a sense of humor with a 7 hr wait and a pap smear(Oh yes you are bleeding heavily!)) I turned down heavy narcotics, (ie IV morphine and a script of percocet). I have my pills and they get me by, they by no means do more than take the edge off of most of the pain, but I am no longer a junkie and I am learning to live with and deal with my pain from what ever source it comes. Pain is my friend. I hate my friend, but I am not a drooling stupid thieving junkie. I am a person on my road of life trying to make the best of what my road has to offer. I am lucky I am not as sick as some people, and I have more good days than bad... well not in the last month but oh well...

So to the force that runs the universe, I messed with a junkies head, and I was not a nice person. I am sorry and I know that my Karma will come back to me on this one.
It was still funny as hell.
I am not always a nice person. and some people are still fair game. I'm working on it.
the karma pool will have something interesting in for me I am sure.

So next time you are accosted by a crack head at 1 am in an ER parking lot, hopefully you will be nicer than I was. and hopefully You won't get robbed.
Oh well *W*H*A*T*E*V*E*R!!!

this is why I am going to hell!

thanks for reading,
love and fishy fishes.
Adora!