I will discuss something that is currently bugging me.
I am losing weight. more than that I am gaining muscle and dropping size.
it may come to a screeching halt.
I cannot get my head wrapped around this.
I wish I was sexless.
I don't like the looks I am getting.
it actually hurts when I catch a guy staring at my tits.
yes they are big, but come on, look at my eyes, not where you think my nipples are.
we had a new tenant move in and he is "let me take you out to lunch," and "you are the perfect woman Shannon."
I don't let men buy me anything, you know why? cause I owe them a blow job for the lunch they paid for.
STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!
so I am hiding out in my room afraid of running into said asshole. (I am afraid of what I am going to say to him, it will not be nice.)
I am afraid for the next guy that is inappropriate. I don't know what I will do, but years of repressed actions for all the times I have been raped will be ugly.
I am really afraid.
I just want to be left alone.
this is seriously screwing with my head and my weight loss.
last time I was raped in 2006, the weight just piled back on.
maybe therapy tomorrow will help.
I feel trapped and I HATE it.
carry on with you life and thanks for listening.