Thursday, February 25, 2010


well I am off, but we already knew that!
we leave for a 3 day vacation till Monday tomorrow.
I have vowed no computer during that time, so I will see ya all mondayish, and I have great stuff to post when I get back. I need a break and I am getting one
love ya all, Adora

Sunday, February 21, 2010

A message from my great friend Beth!

I'm done with this snow. I want to see green. Hell, I just want to see dirt. What is Spring like in Alaska? Are you able to plant veggies?

(I'm listening to Leonard Cohen singing "Suzanne" right now....swoon)

Spring... oh you mean breakup season!
we have 3 seasons Breakup, construction, and winter.
now construction season can be year round, most it happens when we have days of 20+hours of day light. it also happens when we have 4 hours of twilight.
winter is from sept/oct to april/may as we could get snow anytime. at the last minute and it can be 1/4 of an inch, to non sticking to 20 feet. currently we are in breakup with ice and water and dirty snow and temps in the early 30's, it will freeze again and we will get more snow...
may is when it heats up and from there it is anyone's guess. rain all summer, hot and sunny, mixture of both, or just in the 60's where I like it to stay, if not then it is cold showers. and hiding in an air conditioned room.
I hate clothes. my father grew up in a nudist colony, need less to say I loved being naked as a child and still do.
I don't grow things I mould them.
we have the best soil up here.
does me no good.
oh well.

for the men in my life...

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, If I died, would you get another dog??

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away..

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.


Silver in the Hair
Gold in the Teeth.
Stones in the Kidneys
Sugar in the Blood
Lead in the Feet.
Iron in the Arteries.
And an inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas.

Never thought we'd accumulate such wealth!


Spread the Stupidity

Only in America drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight..

Only in America they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
(let alone do anything with there mouths closed...YEAH, I MEAN YOU!)

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

I like this one!!!
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Friday, February 19, 2010

so that's what those are for...

I thought they were to hang mittens when wet!

Snowmobile trail closed due to TRAFFIC JAM !!

you know it is bad...

When the Dr is telling you that percoset would be much better than vicodin, for the pain.
another ER visit, last night. after a UA and a pelvic exam, everything looked fine, just miserable pain, in my pelvic area. migraine like pain.
I hate percoset.
reminds me of other drugs, that I no longer take or do.
it helps the pain, but I feel sick, so I am cutting the pills in half.
Good news I am in the 450's in weight. so soon I will be in the cat-scan machine.
now I have to see a urologist, the dr thinks I have something wrong with my bladder.
that involves a scope in my bladder and a biopsy of the bladder walls.
at least I am closer to an answer, and the Dr didn't treat me as if I was crazy.
that felt really nice. it is not something I am used to.
they did mention therapy, but not because I am crazy.
to help me deal with the effects that chronic pain is causing like the worsening of my depression.
It is an unbelievable thing, being treated right. having someone care and want to try to find an answer instead of telling me to suffer and shut up.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

this is some tired pussy, but well read
hope this makes you smile!
this was sent to me by a male friend. made me smile.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

'Jesus knows you're here.'

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when
a voice in the dark said,
'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze.
When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard
'Jesus is watching you.'
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.
Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed. 'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'


thanks to Jesse!

At last . . . someone in this world has done some very valid and very valuable research on the human condition!

Dictionary for Women
How To Speak Womanese


Tuesday, February 16, 2010

an award from AV!

Have a look at the blog that created this award:"Arte da Li"

The rules for this award are:
1. Post the sentence : Nenhum olhar è mais puro do que uma criança.... btw, the phrase in Portuguese translated: "There is nothing so pure as the look of a child."

2. Post the award.
3. Mention the blog that gave birth to this award: "Arte da Li"
4. Mention and thank the blog that gave you this award and post their blog link. thanks to AV!
5. Pass it on to 10 blogs and leave a comment on their blogs to let them know they've been awarded.
The 10 blogs I chose are:

plainolebob @

missykimmy @

Naomi! @

Workforced @

Micheal @

Beth @

coyoteprime @

jesse @



enjoy all!

Monday, February 15, 2010


now that being said it was a quality roast the size of a 3 month old baby.
cabbage, potatoes, onions, mushrooms, basil, carrots, celery, greens, olive oil, butter, garlic. bake at 400 degrees for an hour and kick it back to 325 for the remaining time.
the men I live with descended on the meat, and veggies, while I at the veggies. my stomach does really bad things with red meat in it. most meat period.
so today I am eating cut up apple, off brand grape-nuts with almond milk, yoghurt, some goat cheese, coffee with honey, and a new favorite... Rambutan stuffed with pineapple chunks.
AHHH!!!!! click on the title of this post.

they are like eating a cross between a melon and a grape. they are kinda chewy.
I have always been an adventurous eater. and a good one at that.

I love to eat and love to cook to the determinant of myself and others.
fat men are happy men.
and extremely protective, as three of them worked to keep me happy and keep certain other men away from me, being it is valentines day, and I am the only real woman that they know in there life. and I am sought out and cornered when I am in the kitchen doing my magic.
so one sees the bane of my existence approach, make a call to another who goes and gets a third who is like kryptonite to the bane. still loneliness prevails and I let him bask in my maternal glory, for a certain period, then shoo him out. as I have been told by the three he GETS NO FOOD!
my god do they get possessive about there pot roasts, and her Adorabibbleness!
so while the roast was awesome, the veggies are the hit. I was going to do some veggies today, but sleep won out. so maybe my butternut squash soup tomorrow.
Butternut squash is a pain in the ass to get into, and peel.
I took a chunk out of my thumb and my hand was numb, after four gourds.
simple soup. butternut 3/4ths, potato 1/4, veggie stock, and coconut milk. blend with hand mixer. until you have this lovely butterscotch foam. best really cold as it thickens.
so that is my food porn blog. love ya all.

valentines day gifts



An atheist was walking through the woods.

'What majestic trees!
'What powerful rivers!
'What beautiful animals!
He said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river,
he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder
and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him...

At that instant the Atheist cried out,
'Oh my God!'

Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist
and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'
'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?
Am I to count you as a believer?'

The atheist looked directly into the light, 'It would be hypocritical
of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now,
but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'

'Very well,' said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.
And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together,
bowed his head and spoke:

'For what I am about to receive, may the Lord make me truly thankful, Amen.'

Sunday, February 14, 2010


I have had some quality sleep, oh boy the difference that makes.

My neighbor has had to have the woman banned from the building.
I refused to move as did he. I apologised due to my unhappy voice.
not cause I had to, because that is the kind of person I am.
it doesn't matter if i think I wasn't yelling, he did.

I have had some time to think. and meditate, I have gotten some really great advise from friends and the owner. he told me that the only one holding me back was me. I was pissed at that, cause he was right.
so that is what i have been thinking about. me.
and what I do to myself, and how it affects others.
people don't like it when I am unhappy, or worse.
for starters they have to deal with me and they love me.
and boy I don't make it easy.

so I have had yet another life lesson courtesy of my behaviour.

notice I didn't say anyone else's? ya know why?
I am the only one i can control. and i am not responsible for anyone other than me.
I am responsible to them and that is what i think being an adult is.
it sucks sometimes, others it is great.

the world looks allot better when I sleep.
love ya all happy valentines day!
love and fishy fishes,

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Friday, February 12, 2010


well I am fucked and not in a good way.
I saw the psych and the upped and diddled my meds.
the owner came by and asked if I would move into another room.
and I had to apologise, for my yelling phone calls.
I wasn't yelling it was my unhappy voice. my yelling is like the pits of hell being released.
I did sleep last night. I was losing weight, and having better liver functions, but sanity comes over physical health.
it is my choice to stay. until I decide to leave or they get sick of me and make me leave.

What did I did wrong?
oh that's right I am the crazy one.

if I was doing drugs, beating people up or setting fires. I would be fine.

did I mention I had to apologise??



An older gentleman had an appointment to see the urologist who shared offices with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. As he approached the receptionist's desk, he noticed that the receptionist was a large unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumo wrestler.

He gave her his name.

In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, "YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE; YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?"

All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man...

He recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, 'NO, I'VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON'T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS.'

The room erupted in applause!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

I bet we can find 1,000,000 People who Support Same Sex Marriage

check it out an sign their petition.


I see the psych today. but LAST night was a doozie.

she was drunk, and he was pushing her out, she was pushing in, they were fighting in the hallway in front of my door, SHE SET FIRE TO HIS TRASH CAN!!!
his smoke alarm went off and he took the burning can out side, she disappeared.

thank god for smoke alarms and fire sprinkler systems.

why do I live here? where else am I going to go. limited income, and major disabilities.
assisted living, yeah right, have you seen those places? that is where I will go to die.


Wednesday, February 10, 2010


no psych today, turn out I am not the only one losing my mind. Oh yes, it is FEBRUARY how could I of not seen it coming. every Feb it is like this except it is better this time, and I have extra halodol. TGOODNESS!
but moving heaven and earth I have an appt with a different Dr tomorrow at 2pm.
in 15 days I see mine.
the psych ER is backlogged, I found an option and didn't have sit for hours on end with a bunch of unstable people.
(have you ever heard of the herd mentality? well put a bunch of unstable not put well together people together, and you have a very bad thing)
I am very tired and had a BAD day. there is always tomorrow and march come soon.
I have a 3 day vacation coming up at the end of this month, I am looking forward to it.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

I have to go to the psychiatrist tomorrow,
I can't sleep my neighbours drug dealing girlfriend is out on bail the one that he beat, and went to jail for. and they keep me up nights. it is being dealt with, but not fast enough. and I am losing it.
I need to have my meds upped so I can sleep.
I feel like a failure.
I am 2 toots short of a fruit toot loopy.

to get into the shower at home here tonight I had to put on my swim goggles, so I wouldn't puke. they are my armour.
for those of you that don't know, I was abused in the shower repeatedly.
I have issues with taking showers and I puke my guts out. I have been told to do all kinds of things to deal with it.
the swim goggles work, hey it is better than being in the shower fully dressed, so my clothes get clean at the same time... and they pay people money to tell me that.
so up my meds go... FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, February 8, 2010

the book of love

followers, valentines and such!

lets address them as we go.
followers. I have 23. for a little over a year i guess that is fine. I have some quality followers. I have had more and they have left over time, and ya know what?~ big whoop!
things happen things change.
I know people that have far more than I do.
if I pandered to the masses then I wouldn't be the lovable psychotic piranha teddy-bear playing on my mood swings, you all love.
I love that you guys read and respond.
I would still be doing this even if you didn't...
It's not that I don't love each and everyone of you personally!
The TRUTH... I blog for me, and sometimes my friends as I am doing now.

why do you guys and ladies and etc... blog?
is it for the fickle finger of fate followers?
for the uncooked butter-nut squash in my pants?
where the hell did that come from? oh that is the valentines blog part sorry.

what do you care of stupid Americans? (except the ones that send ya heavy fleece blankets at the hottest time of the year?)

I will follow you to the ends of the earth as long as you lead and I will keep the butter-nut squash warm, for your return!

and I will kick there butt if they are not nice to you!

now Valentines day day...
my other half farted and that sums it up, but I will go into further detail.
unless you buy into the commercial bullshit... WHY?
it had become worse than Christmas!
I will get the lilies and a dolly sans candy, and he got a R. Crumb book and a card.
WTF and ignore and trudge thru the rest of the year trying not to kill each other cause the magic has worn off.
LOOK you doodie heads, if you are lucky enough to have them after the magic has worn off and you actually like them (like and love are two very different things love is that warm feeling between you legs or where ever, like is being able to smile when the are standing next to you and fart!)
IF you are lucky enough to be in like cause it lasts a whole lot longer than love (that is why the valentine steak knives sets end up in each other) then count your blessings.
what it is all about, is when they bring you coffee and it is hot. when the leave the room cause they have to fart (even if they bring it back with them), holding you when you are crying and doing everything they can to get you to stop, cause they would rather rip out there own eyes than to see you sad. to helping you walk across the icy street, cause they CARE!
so it isn't all hot and heavy every single moment, thank god!
he is the first person I see when I wake up and the last when I go to sleep. and we don't even live in the same room. Thank god!
You know what i will be doing Valentines day?
stitching with old ladies, cause it is what I like.
nothing special, but oh so important, spending the day with the man I am in like with and hoping that the rest of my days are so lucky.
it isn't what you have it is what you do with it.
love and fishy fishes

Sunday, February 7, 2010

the promise...

Shake the Disease

I'm not going down on my knees
Begging you to adore me
Can't you see it's misery
And torture for me
When I'm misunderstood
Try as hard as you can
I've tried as hard as I could
To make you see
How important it is for me

Here is a plea
From my heart to you
Nobody knows me
As well as you do
You know how hard it is for me
To shake the disease
That takes hold of my tongue
In situations like these

Understand me

Some people have to be
Permanently together
Lovers devoted
To each other forever
Now I've got things to do
And I've said before
That I know you have too
When I'm not there
In spirit I'll be there

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Thursday, February 4, 2010


they 1/2 my haldol. no wonder life is such much more vivid.
and the ice pick pain behind my eyes.
I drawed 5 more pictures.
I am not the best artist, but they say what I think.
the voice told me to draw a cubed squid chair.
I don't know what that is I will have to think about it.

This is for Beth

I must forget the sweet things you said to me as I run away from our wedding, taking off in the middle of I Don't, I loved you till that moment. I will never love again.
Why did I think it would work?
We do love each other. I don't love you enough to do this, so I run as I have run from all the things in my life, both good and bad.
the look on your face is burned into my memory, as if I had slapped you across the face with a frozen halibut that I could barely lift.
halibut is tasty but it will rot if not frozen or eaten.
I am frozen and I will not be eaten to be your clone. and I will not be left to rot again.
I am alone in my frozen silence.
you will remember the halibut and starve.
it is what it is.


Beth I hope you like that, the sign wasn't for you the sign was for the story!!
this is for you


It's one of those Schizo affective days folks!

How many of my readers and followers know that I am Schizo affective?
that means that I am Schizophrenic and Bi polar II.
I am not a rapid cycler, it is one of my many diagnoses.
now if you READ my blog I think you may have figured it out by now....

I am feeling creative, and I feel that most of my real creativity comes from mental illness.
I have nightmares, every night.
J and I don't talk about them, not that I don't want to.
he can't deal with it. what that means is he feels helpless and has no answers to what I am telling him.
No real frame of reference.
I also actively hallucinate, so the added fun.

it is hard to understand, like me trying to me male (though I did have a dream recently where I was male and good god how do you guys do it with your pecker leading you around all the time, a breeze, did she smile at me? my center of being was below waist level, it was scary and amazing)

I have recurring nightmares that come to visit.
so since I can't talk about them, I have started to draw them.
hard when you can't discuss the drawings, I showed J one this am.
his head started to hurt.
it is of a singing (wo)man that is stuck in a planet surface, with half visible parts of people fused into the planet, and the parts that can scream do, unless she sings to them.

J said that there were allot of private parts showing.
just like a guy he notices the penises and breasts first...

now I have studied dream interpretation, and I know what this one means to me. BFD!
I have dreams that I can't discuss if I do I will vomit.
Inside my head is not a nice place.
whether it was the consistent abuse from a very young age to the mental illness, to the drugs I did. (never hallucinogens other than pot, I was way to scared to let it all go, I don't think I would come back)
I don't know. I have a pain behind my eyes and thing that need to see the light of day.
reminds me of a song I like by David Bowie, "time will crawl"

here are the words:
"I've never sailed on a sea
I would not challenge a giant
I could not take on the church
Time will crawl
Till the 21st century lose

I know a government man
He was as blind as the moon
He saw the sun in the night
He took a top-gun pilot and he
He made him fly thru a hole
Till he grew real old
And he never came down
He just flew till he burst

Time will crawl
Till our mouths
run dry
Time will crawl
Till our feet
grow small
Time will crawl
Till our tails
fall off
Time will crawl
till the 21st century lose

I saw a black black stream
Full of white eyed fish
And a drowning man
With no eyes at all
I felt a warm warm breeze
That melted metal and steel
I got a bad migraine
That lasted three long years
And the pills that I took
Made my fingers disappear

Time will crawl, time will crawl
Time will crawl
Till the 21st century lose

You were a talented child
You came to live in our town
We never bothered to scream
When your mask came off
We only smelt the gas
As we lay down to sleep

Time will crawl
and our heads bowed down
Time will crawl
and our eyes fall out
Time will crawl
and the streets run red
Time will crawl
till the 21st century lose

Time will crawl
and our mouths run dry
Time will crawl
and our feet grow small
Time will crawl
and our tails fall off
Time will crawl
till the 21st century lose

Time will crawl
and our heads bowed down
Time will crawl
and our eyes fall out
Time will crawl
and the streets run red
Time will crawl
till the 21st century lose

For the crazy child
We'll give every life
For the crackpot notion"

for what ever it means that is how I feel today

Welcome to Workedforced!

Don Joe at

here is a sample of his blog that made me wish I hadn't had coffee in my mouth!

"Complement the photos of their gap-toothed children. Something better than “Wow, I didn’t think you could breed.”"


Wednesday, February 3, 2010


My nose was blowing money, I'd spend it all on you,
but it is SNOT!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010



I am now going to bed on a horrid day, i feel like shit all the cold products have alcohol and with the whoo hoo pill it would cause a very nasty reaction.
I can't take sudafed, or afrin, peel me off the ceiling with a spatula.
I have to use my asthma inhailer and that is bad enough.
All I want to do is cry and I am going now after I take my meds.
J is here and is going to take care of me.
he has my dr suess christmas hat between his butt cheeks(it will be washed), and my jingle bell beanie on his head.
I will laugh and cry.

I am a bitchy ray of gloom!

not only am I sick, I made a woman cry today.

I live in a roomimg house. I am the one that rents to my room-mates, I am the assistant to my boss.
I'm the fun one.
we rent to felons.(yes even the special kinds)
NP! I am a big girl with a Gestapo attitude.

A woman called today for her son an felon, he is 23 and has been out 3 months and lives at home. he has no job and she wanted to guarantee his rent.

why isn't he calling me?
he has no job.

I only talk to the people I rent to, no go betweens.

but she takes him out everyday job hunting.

is she going to be the one I have to deal with when spoiled mama's boy causes a problem, NO!
she is trying to get rid of her problem.

ma'am have you tried kitchen jobs or janitorial jobs?
Nope he doesn't do that.
he can't clean a toilet?
ma'am he is screwed!!

know what you do. take him down to the homeless shelter, kiss him goodbye and leave him there.
that will motivate him.
I am sorry I can help you.

she is crying at this point and I feel like the turd in the punch bowl...

now I feel even shittier.
I don't candy coat it. I call it as I see it.

and if that kid doesn't get some tough love soon, he will be a career criminal. already the worst of the worst as society sees it.
there ain't no sugar coating shit here folks.

I am the Bitchy Ray of Gloom!

Munchkin kittens

another thing Freedom really likes!!! they have much shorter legs that regular cats.

More here:

Monday, February 1, 2010

WELCOME TO!!!! plain ole bob!!!!!!
is only one of his 3 blogs. this is a funny man!( and that is why he got 3 kitties)

Check him out, I COMMAND THEE!!!!!

these shoes suck. these shoes RULE!!!


freedom wants one of these!