Tuesday, October 20, 2009

my skin

The Fool card affirms that my alter ego today is a Quantam Leaper with a hero's heart. My superpower is liberated by free will and trust, which lead me to explore simple speculations for their own sake. I can move beyond the fear factor. I don't know where I'm going, and I don't care where I've been. I only know that, as the hero of my own story, it's for me to find out. For, like Alice, I'm on the verge of stepping into a rabbit hole; unless I stop short and play it safe, I'll know soon enough where following my own feet has landed me on this curious venture. The blissful frailty of unwritten conclusions and unguarded access sweetens the desire. So despite familiar warnings, irresistible promise draws my eyes wide open and away from domestic comfort zones, with only certain inquiry, hope and faith to recommend my course. I'll never know until I try.
this is my card for tomorrow.

I went to the gym today, hadn't been in a couple of days.
My skin is thinner than I thought.
after being "mooed" at, and other rude nonsense. I was hurt.
it takes guts when you are 475lbs to wear a bathing suit let alone the rest of it.
I have the best friends, and one of them who is a member I talked to. not really expecting anything. I was just frustrated and hurt.
She was my champion today.
it resolved some things. and after a talk with someone I am getting a tour and some help with using more than just the pool and my walker.
All because I talked and listened, and made my happiness more important that shallow jerks making comments.
My skin is thicker than I thought and it is enough for today.
it is amazing the people that want to help, when I am helping myself.

I am getting through this, I am okay and it is enough, for today...
tomorrow is a different story...
thanks for reading.

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